A little stressed from wedding planning? I was crazy when I planned mine. I drove my husband crazy too. Of course he did not tell me that at the time.
There are tons of great sites that can give you advice on how to get married, what to do first, and lists to check off. I am not an expert but here’s some personal insight based on what things made my life really stressful while we were engaged.
Here’s my list of mistakes we made.
- Giving yourself too many months (or years) to plan. We gave ourselves over a year to plan a very intimate wedding. We knew we wanted a small wedding, and having 13 months to think about things just gave me time to question everything. I am not sure how I managed to spend so much time on wedding planning considering I was working 50+ hours per week, took calls from work 24/7, and was exercising like crazy (to get fit for the wedding).
- Changing your mind over and over again. Being an artist, I thought why not make the invitations. I made them 3 times and then bought them. After the wedding I looked back at the ones I made. Versions 2 and 3 were pretty nice. And yes, I made all of them before changing my mind. Granted you definitely get to change your mind but being a little more decisive would have definitely reduced our stress.
- Being unrealistic about costs and needs. I went in thinking that because it was small it would not cost what a wedding normally does. Granted we did not spend $20,000 like my dearest friend did but it was still pricey. We spent extra time by not just being aware in the first place what things cost. One example, is we met a minister who was just perfect for us. We were in a bit of sticker shock so we met with a judge instead. In the end we really wanted the minister, and the $500 price difference was not going to stop us. We just had to decide where to spend and where to save, and doing upfront research can greatly help with this.
- Worrying about what everywhere else wants. It is your day. Do not follow conventional rules, unless you want to. Do not listen to worry about what your aunt in Ohio will think. Just do what is in your heart.
- Not hearing opinions of those close to you. Yes, this sounds to go against what I just said but it does not. Sometimes those close to you know you better than you think. We were going to have a Sandal’s Weddingmoon but our families were upset. When we really thought about it having our parents and dearest friends there was more important than getting married on an island beach.
In the end we had an absolutely perfect wedding, that I could not imagine any other way. Maybe all the fretting, worrying, and indecisiveness were meant to be, and what led to us having an amazing day.
